So, what is this fascination with being perfect anyway?? I know, I know...pretty heavy opening for one of my blogs. But, hear me out. Maybe it's the glass of wine I had, or the fact that we just turned our TV back on after 4 months of nothing...all there is out there on TV is images of how we need to be a certain way. From the infomercials to reality tv, the commercials blaring during the down time between Dora to Blues Clues, to even the news (which for the record, I REFUSE to watch.) I don't get it. I thought that with all that has and is changing in our world that people might actually stop caring so much about everything that is materialistic and disposable and start thinking on a grander scale.

I think I have lost a bit of faith in humanity. There. I wrote it...I feel saddened by the way that wrinkles, grey hair and a few extra pounds are an indicator of used or damaged goods. You see, in my life, I see these things as a sign of a life well lived. My wrinkles, they adorn the outsides of my eyes and lips and are from the many, many times I am found laughing. The grey hairs are undoubtedly from my children, God bless them, they are little poops at times, but, I love the grey hairs that they have given me...I have them because I am a Mom. It would be awesome to have a rock hard body like many of the celebrities out there..but, not at the sacrifice of my health, time with my family, my body image or the way my daughter views beauty. We are role models. Every little person out there looks up to us to make this world feel right, good and safe. I don't get it...when did falseity and coverup become more important than the truth???

Maybe it's late and I am overtired, or maybe I have just really gotten tired of the way we all are. It's a bit sickening to see that everything out there is aimed towards mass consumerism. That this is what we have been reduced to. Work - Shop - Work - Shop....lather, rinse, repeat. I don't know. I desperately pine for simpler things. For a time when a credit score doesn't own me. A time where you buy what you have money for. We have been purging. Getting rid of things that are not absolutely needed. It's feels...liberating.

I can't wait to be COMPLETELY debt free and self sufficient. That time will come soon enough. I just need time to be with my family, to see my husband more. I mean, who has it better?? The millionaire in their big huge mansion that works all the time, has a nanny for thier children whom they rarely see, has affairs and spends more time with thier agent?? Or, the average person, possibly struggling to make ends meet, but so relieved at the end of the day to just be with their loved ones. Solice in the things that make him whole? I just don't get how that is not the #1 priority for most people anymore..... Money changes everything, and not always for the better.