Wednesday, March 26, 2008

Picking flowers

Ok...I have to post this one. I try not to be too overly negative, it is not good for your mind, it is not good for you period...but, you DO have to get things out to clear your thoughts, so, I am doing it. It's a simple concept really, you are a little girl, you see flowers, you feel an overcompulsory need to pick them right? Well, WRONG if you go to a certain family members house that is related to me by marriage...following me so far? She loves to pick me flowers...I actually have a baggie of EVERY flower she has ever given me. This love for picking me flowers does not stop when she goes to SAID peoples house. BUT...she is reamed everytime she attempts this innocent and perfectly normal act. I don't understand it. Why can't she pluck a little flower here or there without hearing "UG, *Lord's name in vain* DON'T pick the flowers!!!!" One time, she was in their courtyard, surrounded by the MANY flowers and pots all over the place...she picks me a flower, hears the statement of how she shouldn't be doing that, like its a bad thing and that those were THEIR flowers. She responds "No, they are God's flowers." That's my girl....but, it was quickly ruined by "YEAH, but I planted them" UH, ok, that makes you better than God then? Why rebute with that? Whatever....I finally told her that it was their rules, I didn't agree with them, but, that when we are THERE, that she should refrain from doing what she loves. Anyone have any thoughts on this?

2 comments:

"Intentionally Katie" said...

We're also dealing with the "our family rules aren't always universal" concept. Ryan sees kids doing things we don't allow (ie riding their bikes in the street, calling other kids names at the park) and he gets confused about why those kids aren't following "the rules." For those things, we've been focusing on "Every family has different rules and in our family, that's not acceptable."

In areas where we're more flexible (ie licking your fingers while baking, which is a huge no-no *health code violation* when they cook together at school) and there are rules that don't make sense based on our house rules, I do kind of the same thing and explain that our rules at home might be different than rules at a friend's house or at school or in another setting. I usually try to remind him of that before we go somewhere, if I know someone has a different set of guidelines. Also explaining that they're not wrong, they're just different. I try to avoid judging others' rules (even if they're ridiculous...I mean, flowers!??!!? Come on!) so he'll respect the rules of others whether or not they make sense to him. This is a huge life lesson, in my mind, b/c there are plenty of rules (certain traffic laws come to mind) that I think are silly, but I still have to obey them or I could get a ticket. (I'll even explain this to Ryan so he sees that even adults have rules to follow)

Those are my thoughts on the matter...sorry for the lengthy comment! XOXOX

Jenn.y.Fur said...

That's simply ridiculous! "said family member" is probably just adding one more thing to her collection of crap and doesn't want one single flower missing. When you guys come to my house Trin can pick as many flowers as she wants.. If she can find any that is. :o)